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第92章

时尚女魔头 穿普拉达的恶魔 英文原版-第92章


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  forgotten the plaque。 A staffer followed me to the lobby; 
  where I’d just collapsed in a fit of exhaustion and 
  humiliation; and handed it to me。 I waited until she left and 
  asked one of the janitors to throw it out。 He shrugged and 
  tossed it in his bag。

  That bitch!I thought; too angry and tired to conjure up any 
  really creative names or methods of ending her life。 My phone 
  rang and; knowing it was her; I turned off the ringer and 
  ordered a gin and tonic from one of the front desk people。 
  “Please。 Please just have someone send one out。 Please。” The 
  woman took one look at me and nodded。 I sucked the entire 
  thing down in just two long gulps and headed back upstairs to 
  see what she wanted。 It was only two in the afternoon of my 
  first day in Paris; and I wanted to die。 Only death was not an 
  option。


  17                                                             

  “Miranda Priestly’s room;” I answered from my new Parisian 
  office。 My four glorious hours that were supposed to 
  constitute a full night’s sleep had been rudely interrupted by 
  a frantic call from one of Karl Lagerfeld’s assistants at sixA 
  。M。; which is precisely when I’d discovered that all of 
  Miranda’s phone calls were being routed directly tomy room for 
  answering。 It appeared the entire city and surrounding area 
  knew Miranda stayed here during the shows; and so my phone had 
  been ringing incessantly since the moment I stepped inside。 
  Never mind the two dozen messages that had already been left 
  on the voice mail。

  “Hi; it’s me。 How’s Miranda doing? Is everything OK? Did 
  anything go wrong yet? Where is she and why aren’t you with 
  her?”

  “Hey; Em! Thanks for caring。 How are you feeling; by the way?”

  “What? Oh; I’m fine。 A little weak; but getting better。 
  Whatever。 How isshe ?”

  “Yes; well; I’m fine; too; thanks for asking。 Yes; it was a 
  long flight to get here and I haven’t slept for more than 
  twenty minutes at a time since the phone keeps ringing and I’m 
  pretty sure it’s never going to stop; and; oh! I gave a 
  pletely impromptu speech—after writing an impromptu 
  speech—to a group of people who wanted Miranda’s pany but 
  apparently weren’t interesting enough to warrant it。 Looked 
  like a giant fucking idiot; actually; and nearly gave myself a 
  heart attack in the process; but hey; other than that; things 
  are just great。”

  “Andrea! Be serious! I’ve been really worried about 
  everything。 There wasn’t a lot of time to prepare for this; 
  and you know that if anything goes wrong over there she’s 
  going to blame me anyway。”

  “Emily。 Please don’t take this personally; but I can’t talk to 
  you right now。 I just can’t do it。”

  “Why? Is something wrong? How did her meeting go yesterday? 
  Did she get there on time? Do you have everything you need? 
  Are you making sure to wear appropriate clothes? Remember; 
  you’re representingRunway over there; so you always have to 
  look the part。”

  “Emily。 I need to hang up now。”

  “Andrea! I’m concerned。 Tell me what you’ve been doing。”

  “Well; let’s see。 In all the free time I’ve had; I’ve gotten a 
  half…dozen or so massages; two facials; and a few manicures。 
  Miranda and I have really bonded over doing the whole spa 
  thing together。 It’s great fun。 She’s really trying hard not 
  to be too demanding; says she really wants me to enjoy Paris 
  since it’s such a wonderful city and I’m lucky to be here。 So 
  basically we just hang out and have fun。 Drink great wine。 
  Shop。 You know; the usual。”

  “Andrea! This is really not funny; OK? Now tell me what the 
  hell is going on。” With every degree more annoyed she sounded; 
  my mood improved a notch。

  “Emily; I’m not sure what to tell you。 What do you want to 
  hear? How it’s been so far? Let’s see; I’ve spent most of my 
  time trying to figure out how best to sleep through a phone 
  that won’t stop ringing while simultaneously shoving enough 
  food down my throat between the hours of two and sixA 。M。 to 
  sustain me for the remaining twenty hours。 It’s like fucking 
  Ramadan here; Em—no eating during daylight hours。 Yeah; you 
  should be really sorry you’re missing this one。”

  The other line began blinking and I put Emily on hold。 Every 
  time it rang my mind went quickly; uncontrollably; to Alex; 
  wondering if he just might call and say that everything was 
  going to be just fine。 I’d called twice on my international 
  cell since I’d arrived and he’d answered both times; but like 
  the expert prank caller I’d been in junior high; I’d hung up 
  the moment I’d heard his voice。 It’d been the longest we’d 
  ever gone without talking and I wanted to hear what was going 
  on; but I also couldn’t help feeling like life had gotten 
  significantly simpler since we’d taken a break from the 
  bickering and the guilt…mongering。 Still; I held my breath 
  until I heard Miranda’s voice screeching from across the 
  wires。

  “Ahn…dre…ah; when is Lucia due to arrive?”

  “Oh; hello; Miranda。 Let me just check the itinerary I have 
  for her。 Here it is。 Let’s see; it says here that she was 
  flying in directly from the shoot in Stockholm today。 She 
  should be at the hotel。”

  “Connect me。”

  “Yes; Miranda; just a moment; please。”

  I put her on hold and switched her back to Emily。 “That’s her; 
  hold on。”

  “Miranda? I just found Lucia’s number。 I’ll connect you now。”

  “Wait; Ahn…dre…ah。 I’ll be leaving the hotel in twenty minutes 
  for the rest of the day。 I’ll need some scarves before I 
  return; and a new chef。 He should have a minimum of ten years’ 
  experience in mostly French restaurants and be available for 
  family dinners four nights a week and dinner parties twice a 
  month。Now connect me to Lucia。”

  I knew I should’ve gotten hung up on the fact that Miranda 
  wanted me to hire her a New York chef from Paris; but all I 
  could focus on was that she was leaving the hotel—without me; 
  and for the entire day。 I clicked back to Emily and told her 
  that Miranda needed a new chef。

  “I’ll work on it; Andy;” she announced while coughing。 “I’ll 
  do some preliminary screening and then you can talk to a few 
  of the finalists。 Just find out if Miranda would like to wait 
  until she gets Home to meet them or if she’d prefer if you 
  arranged for a couple to fly there and meet with her now; OK?”

  “You can’t be serious。”

  “Well; of course I’m serious。 Miranda hired Cara when she was 
  in Marbella last year。 Their last nanny had just quit and she 
  had me fly three finalists to her so she could find someone 
  right away。 Just find out; OK?”

  “Sure;” I muttered。 “And thanks。”

  Just talking about those massages had sounded so good; I 
  decided to book one for myself。 There wasn’t an appointment 
  available until early evening; so I called room service in the 
  meantime and ordered a full breakfast。 When the butler 
  delivered it to me; I’d already crawled back into one of the 
  plush robes; donned a pair of the matching slippers; and 
  prepared myself to feast on the omelet; croissants; Danishes; 
  muffins; potatoes; cereal; and crepes that arrived smelling so 
  good。 After devouring all the food and two cups of tea; I 
  waddled back to the bed I hadn’t really slept in the night 
  before and fell asleep so quickly that I wondered if someone 
  had slipped something in my orange juice。

  The massage was the perfect way to top off what had been a 
  blessedly relaxed day。 Everyone else was doing my work for me; 
  and Miranda had only called and woken me once—once!—to request 
  that I make her a lunch reservation the following day。This 
  isn’t so ba

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