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第86章

时尚女魔头 穿普拉达的恶魔 英文原版-第86章


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  of me—with aloe vera)。

  Tucked in a side pocket of the smaller case were legal…size 
  pieces of paper with preprinted faces rendered on each one; 
  enlarged to fit the page。 Each face bragged an impressive 
  makeover: Allison had applied the actual makeup she’d included 
  in the kit to the paper faces。 One face was eerily labeled 
  “Relaxed Evening Glamour” but had a caveat under it in big; 
  bold marker that read: NOT FOR BLACK…TIE!! TOO CASUAL!! The 
  nonformal face had a light covering of the matte foundation 
  under a slight brush of bronzing powder; a light dab of liquid 
  or “crème” blush; some very sexy; dark…lined and heavily 
  shadowed eyelids accented by jet black mascara’d lashes; and 
  what appeared to be a quick; casual swipe of high…gloss lip 
  color。 When I’d mumbled under my breath to Allison that this 
  would be utterly impossible for me to recreate; she looked 
  exasperated。

  “Well; hopefully you won’t have to;” she said in a voice that 
  sounded so taxed; I thought she might collapse under the 
  weight of my ignorance。

  “No? Then why do I have nearly two dozen ‘faces’ suggesting 
  different ways to use all this stuff?”

  Her withering glance was worthy of Miranda。

  “Andrea。 Be serious。 This is for emergencies only; in case 
  Miranda asks you to go somewhere with her at the last minute; 
  or if your hair and makeup person can’t make it。 Oh; that 
  reminds me; let me show you the hair stuff I packed。”

  As Allison demonstrated how to use four different types of 
  round brushes to blow my hair straight; I tried to make sense 
  of what she’d just said。 I would have a hair and makeup 
  person; too? I hadn’t arranged for anyone to do me when I’d 
  booked all of Miranda’s people; so who had? I had to ask。

  “The Paris office;” Allison replied with a sigh。 “You’re 
  representingRunway; you know; and Miranda is very sensitive to 
  that。 You’ll be attending some of the most glamorous events in 
  the world alongside Miranda Priestly。 You don’t think you 
  could achieve the right look on your own; do you?”

  “No; of course not。 It’s definitely better that I have 
  professional help for this。 Thank you。”

  Then Allison kept me cornered an additional two hours until 
  she was satisfied that if any of the fourteen hair and makeup 
  appointments I had scheduled over the course of the week fell 
  through; I wouldn’t humiliate our boss by smearing the mascara 
  across my lips or shaving the sides of my head and spiking the 
  center into a mohawk。 When we were through; I thought I’d 
  finally get a moment to race down to the dining room and grab 
  some calorie…enriched soup; but Allison picked up Emily’s 
  extension—her old phone line—and dialed Stef in the 
  accessories department。

  “Hi; I’m done with her and she’s here right now。 You want to 
  e over?”

  “Wait! I need to go get lunch before Miranda es back!”

  Allison rolled her eyes just like Emily。 I wondered if it was 
  something about that particular position that inspired such 
  expert demonstrations of irritation。 “Fine。 No; no; I was 
  talking to Andrea;” she said into the phone; raising her 
  eyebrows at me—surprise; surprise—just like Emily。 “It seems 
  that she’shungry 。 I know。 Yes; I know。 I told her that; but 
  she seems intent on 。 。 。eating 。”

  I walked out of the office and picked up a large cup of cream 
  of broccoli with cheddar cheese and returned within three 
  minutes to find Miranda sitting at her desk; holding the phone 
  receiver away from her face like it was covered in leeches。 
  She was due to fly to Milan that very evening but I wasn’t 
  sure I’d survive to see it happen。

  “The phone rings; Andrea; but when I pick it up—because you’re 
  apparently not interested in doing so—no one’s there。 Can you 
  explain this phenomenon?” she asked。

  Of course I could explain it; just not to her。 On the rare 
  occasion that Miranda was in her office alone; she sometimes 
  picked up the phone when it rang。 Naturally callers were so 
  shocked to hear her voice on the other end that they promptly 
  hung up。 No one was actually prepared tospeak with her when 
  they called; since the likelihood of being put through was 
  next to nil。 I’d gotten dozens of e…mails from editors or 
  assistants informing me—as if I didn’t know—that Miranda was 
  answering the phone again。 “Where are you guys???” The 
  panicked missives would read; one after another。 “She’s 
  answering her own phone!!!!”

  I mumbled something about how I; too; received hang…ups every 
  now and then; but Miranda had already lost interest。 She was 
  peering not at me but at my cup of soup。 Some of the creamy 
  green fluid was dripping slowly down the side。 Her gaze turned 
  to one of disgust when she realized I was not only holding 
  something edible; but that I had clearly planned to consume it 
  as well。

  “Dispose of that immediately!” she barked from fifteen feet 
  away。 “The smell of it alone is enough to make me ill。”

  I dropped the offending soup in the garbage can and gazed 
  wistfully after the lost nourishment before her voice jerked 
  me back to reality。

  “I’m ready for the run…throughs!” she screeched; settling back 
  into her chair more easily now that the food she’d spotted 
  atRunway had been discarded。 “And the moment we’re through 
  here; call the features meeting。”

  Each word caused another adrenaline surge; since I was never 
  sure what exactly she’d be requesting; I was never sure if I’d 
  be able to handle it or not。 Since it was Emily’s job to 
  schedule the run…throughs and the weekly meetings; I had to 
  race over to her desk and check her appointment book。 In the 
  three o’clock slot she had scribbled:Sedona Shoot run…through; 
  Lucia/Helen 。 I jabbed Lucia’s extension and spoke as soon as 
  she picked up the phone。

  “She’s ready;” I stated; like a military mander。 Helen; 
  Lucia’s assistant; hung up without saying a word; and I knew 
  she and Lucia were already halfway to the office。 If they 
  didn’t arrive within twenty to twenty…five seconds; I would be 
  sent out to hunt them down and remind them in person—just in 
  case they might have forgotten—that when I’d called thirty 
  seconds before and said that Miranda was ready right then; I 
  meant rightthen 。 Generally this was a mere annoyance; yet 
  another reason why the enforced footwear of spiky stilettos 
  made life even more miserable。 Running through the office; 
  frantically searching for someone who was most likely hiding 
  from Miranda was never fun; but it was only really miserable 
  when that person happened to be in the bathroom。 Whatever one 
  does in a men’s or ladies’ room; however; is no excuse for not 
  being available at the exact moment your presence is expected; 
  and so I had to charge right in—sometimes checking underneath 
  the stalls for recognizable footwear—and politely ask in 
  whatever humiliated way I could manage that they finish up and 
  head to Miranda’s office。 Immediately。

  Luckily for everyone involved; Helen arrived within seconds; 
  pushing an overflowing; off…kilter wheeled rack in front of 
  her and pulling another behind her。 She hesitated briefly 
  outside Miranda’s French door before she received one of 
  Miranda’s imperceptible nods and then dragged the racks 
  through the thick carpeting。

  “This is all of it? Two racks?” Miranda asked; barely looking 
  up from the copy she was reading。

  Helen was clearly surprised at being addressed; since; as a 
  rule; Miranda didn’t speak to other people’s assistants。 But 
  Lucia hadn’t shown up with her own racks yet; so there was 
  little choice。

  “Um; uh; no。 Lucia will be here in just a

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